Monday 25 September 2017

Working life

Been so long since I really went on a real date with my boyfriend, and spending the whole day together!!

To be honest, I dont really talk about my work life on social media except about how tiring etc but sometimes I feel that I just wanna let out my feelings.

When I first graduated from ITE my work life has been nothing but the best and things went for a twist around near to end of last year. My contract with my company is ending and my supervisor initially wanted to convert me to a perm staff but company isnt doing well which lead to lots of freeze in doing things like converting contract staff to perm staff etc and also some managers are being told that when and when will be their last day of work. My supervisor managed to extend me a month or two but eventually the second month I decided to not continue because I know that its very hard for her trying to fight for me to convert because of the situation the company is having and I really wanted to focus on my bike license back then.

After seeing improvement in my bike license i started working as a part time admin first and then I left cos I feel that I want to focus more on my license. Durinf the month of Jan, I decided to give retail line a try as I am really lost about what I love working as and so I decided to give retail a try and after 6 months of working as a part timer I feel that I should stop living my life working as a part timer, but sadly the full timer slots for my work previously just gotten full and therefore I decide to head back to office life. I really want to feel the life I had back then working office line. Spending money like nobody business but eventually I got into a really FUCKED UP catering company! I wish I can just fucking show my middle finger to my ex boss back then. No idea why would a company even hire new staffs when their business are going way down. So much to talk about that company but you know what lets move on.

Really, I already set my mind up to work back in the office line but after all the shits I had to deal with that catering company, I really feel so upset and lost like i literally gave up my hope in office line and therefore I went back to retail line. During my this whole month of working, I really just want to head back to working as an admin. I mean I do love my current job now, love interacting with people and so on but I feel that money is important and so are my future. Which like what many say, office life is more better when you have a family in future. Totally true about that.

And now, I feel that in the first place back then, I should just continue working as an admin and not switch to the retail line at all.... I feel that I wasted alot of my time switching back and forth.

I know well that there will be people around me who definitely can't keep their mouth shut but seriously my parents know how I am like. I honestly do not give a single fuck about their thoughts but sometimes I feel really upset like how can they not spare a thought for my feeling or what I went through with having to join few companies before that are so fucked up (which I did not mention in my post) and yet all they do is talking negative shits about me. I had enough living for people. Now, I just want to live for myself. I used to be those who only care for others feeling, even though I feel hurt or upset, I choose to keep it inside my heart because I do not want the people I love to be hurt of feel how I felt. But as I grow up, I think only about myself and people who give a shit who cares about my feeling. To those who talks only what they want to say without thinking what I had to gone through before or the situation im in, feel free to be out of my life. Totally fine with that ✌

I am just contented to know that I have a grandparents who dote on me alot and i feel so shitty cuz its been long I visit them and I really should be visiting them soon. A parents who love me, especially my stepdad which I should mention, love me like his own and my mum I think she is really lucky to found him.

And lastly, my boyfriend. Even though he scold me often about my jobs and how we often quarreled after talking about it I still love him so much cuz he always ended up supporting me after scolding/quarreling 😂

I hope that this blog post will help keep me to not ever switch my mind again and please please just stay in office line job. I am still working under retail line right now though.... But I will start looking for admin job soon! But right now I am busy with my current job hopefully I can take some time to find a new job soon and if possible start a new job during Nov or Dec and if things go well, company is a good one and able to work long term! 💪💪

(Hopefully no error in my blogpost cuz I love to type blindly and Im super lazy to read and edit my error if there is any) 😅